Sunday – New Week = New Zit

Church is always an interesting place when you suffer from acne. Everyone there is obviously on their “best” behavior. Fortunately, we go to a smaller congregation where everyone is pretty down to earth, and last week one fella got up into my ear and said, “Nice win on Friday. That was a good, old-fashioned ass kickin’.” I took about 9 steps back, and like, died laughing.

Anyway, today was painful for me…literally. I have a zit on the bridge of my nose where there just isn’t a lot of skin to stretch. It’s so obvious I almost went with the band-aid and claimed that I got scratched during the game on Friday night, but then I thought that starting my week by lying in church probably wasn’t the way I was wanting to go.

Every conversation I had it was like people were talking to my gnarly red bump. They’d look at my eyes, and then the eyes would wander, and I just wanted to say, “Yeah, it hurts as bad as it looks.” I finally know what it’s like for girls with big boobs or putting their cleavage on display – it’s impossible not to look. You hear that ladies? That’s just how it works. It’s like a cat chasing a laser pointer or a dog investigating a strange sound.

So, I talked to probably 20 people in casual conversation, and then I started chatting with our preacher. He’s a younger guy, still in his 20s, and not far removed from grad school. He patted me on the shoulder and said, “Great game on Friday–Geez, that thing’s a beast…does it hurt?”

Who says preacher’s aren’t honest?

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